75

Posted: May 7, 2013 in Bariatric surgery, Digestive issues, Foot issues, Physical activity, Supportive Partner Woman, Weight loss
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So, 305.1 pounds this morning. That means I’m down 75 pounds since I started the program. It’s been ups and downs, and depending on the day, I’m still not sure if I made the right decision. When I step on the scale, I feel I did, however, when I drive past a pizza joint, not so much.

I’m finally off of third shift and settling into a routine on second… my home for the next two months. It is nice to sleep at night and I’ve been having solid nights of sleep, not to mention real, actual dreams. It’s kind of nice, actually. I even see Supportive Partner Woman on a more regular basis.

In other news, I’m still dealing with the Toe. That. Will. Not Heal. It really sucks… I pretty much want nothing more than to be active and this little annoying appendage makes me be sedentary. It’s kind of ironic… I spent all those years being sedentary, and now that I kind of have to be, I just don’t want to. Does that qualify as the whole “other side of the fence” truism?

Deep thoughts for a Tuesday evening.

In other news, I managed to eat part of a wrap. Ham and cheese with a little lettuce and mayo. All on a high-fiber multi-grain wrap. It went down and stayed down. I couldn’t eat all of the wrap itself, but the innards were good and loaded with protein. I also managed to have some chicken pot pie that stayed down. Bacon, though, is another story. Of course, if I can never have bacon again, there might be fighting words, because, well, bacon is awesome!

On that note, I’m going to call it a post. To sum up… weight down, bacon not down.

I’ll catch up with you soon.

Song of the Day: Assault and Battery – Howard Jones

It’s done

Posted: May 5, 2013 in Bariatric surgery, Digestive issues, family, Weight loss
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Yes, third shift is done for the foreseeable future. This makes me happy. I’m looking forward to not being as tired or feeling as sick.

Things are moving along in the expanding the food department. Managed to handle a banana and deviled eggs. The eggs went down so well, I’m going to make a batch of hard boiled eggs just to have them around. As for the banana, it really has helped that nagging sensation of nausea that’s just under the surface. Maybe I just needed some fruit-based carbs. I know I can’t have oranges yet, or anything with skin, but that’s coming in the next couple of weeks.

The weight loss has been coming along. I weighed in yesterday at 308.8, which is a tick over 71 pounds lost. Compare a photo of of me in December with one that SPW took yesterday and you’ll see what I mean. I think it turns out being pretty noticeable. I’m looking forward to the next week or two, when that first digit will be a 2 for the first time in years.

April 2013

April 2013

December 2012

December 2012

So, yesterday involved a first holy Communion for our quasi-niece, Jillian. It was actually a pretty nice affair, despite being seriously long. At one point, I looked at SPW and whispered, “Did we make a wrong turn and end up at Easter Vigil mass instead?” It was still nice to see and brought back memories of my own Communion so many years ago. There’s a sad story that goes along with my Communion… I realize it was 1978, but my parents put me in a leisure suit for it. With giant lapels. About all I can say is that it wasn’t lime green or anything, but a leisure suit is still a leisure suit. Again, one of the highlights of any event such of this is the people watching. There was one communicant’s mother who was dressed in a tight, red, backless cocktail dress complete with hooker heels. No, maybe I’m just getting old, but there are some items that are best not worn to church.

The driving range went pretty well. It’s been such a relief to swing the clubs with less of a belly in the way. It’s also nice to go out and get some fresh air. I’m noticing that the balls are staying straighter, which I’m attributing to getting some practice. And no, not Allen Iverson practice. Just going out and trying to develop some muscle memory. I’m planning on actually getting on a real golf course for the first time in 25 years this summer, so I gotta see if I got game, or at least might not completely suck.

There have still been issues… I get the random bouts of nausea, at odd times. Whether I’ve eaten or not. I still have that scent at the edge of my consciousness that I can’t explain. These things are getting to be less, though, which is a good thing. My gut still rebels at the simple thought of a protein shake, but I’m going to conquer that as well. I’m still cold all the time, which is totally alien to me. I’m hoping that it will improve my adjustments to hotter weather… nothing stinks more than going to Disney World and feeling like a limp dishrag. I am looking forward to getting the same picture taken as last December’s, just to really illustrate what a difference the operation has been.

At any rate, that’s about it for today. I’ve got to roust SPW as we’re going to play a round of miniature golf before she has to work. We’re going to try a course that we’ve not played before. Hope it’s fun!

Song of the Day: Run to the Hills – Iron Maiden

Untitled, mainly because I’m too tired to think of one.

Posted: April 30, 2013 in Bariatric surgery, Cooking, Doctors and Dentists and Nurses... oh my!, Foot issues
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The title pretty much describes how I feel. I left out frustrated, though.

I think the combination of the post operative blues, third shift and the Toe That Will Not. Freakin. Heal. has really been weighing on me. I’m kind of fed up, to the point that weight loss or not, I have times where I regret the surgery. I know, it’s not like I can return it, but I just really want to feel good and instead I feel meh.

That’s not to say I don’t appreciate the fact that I fit in my clothes that much easier and I can bend over and tie my shoes. Hell, I can actually SEE my feet for a change. Better than having to just catch a glimpse over the Buddha. It’s just that while I don’t miss the general lethargy of being a fat tie, I miss the days when I just felt good in general. I haven’t had one of those days since before the operation.

The thing that really bothers me is that I have this scent in my mind. It’s at the edge of my consciousness, I can’t even tell you what it is, but I smell it everywhere. It’s a sickly sweet odor and it can have me on the verge of nausea. I’m not sure why it’s happening, but I think it’s related to surgery. It goes well with my phantom pain from my toe. I’m normal, though… I’ve seen a lot of people post about the phantom scents and that it will usually go away in about two months.

In the good news, the toe has actually started to show some healing. Dr. Miller also fashioned a spacer that I can use to keep the toe off the shoe and I can probably go back to a regular shoe rather than the Boot of Shame. Once it heals up, he wants to do a tendon release, which is a minor surgical procedure that will take about a week to heal. Otherwise, I will be at a higher risk of similar problems in the future. I’m just glad that I might finally be out of the boot. The latex appliance is still curing, but if it gives me a chance to be out of the dreaded boot and getting back to living, well, I’m all for it.

Did some kitchen stuff yesterday. I mixed up a batch of tuna salad and also made my first-ever oven roasted chicken. I rubbed the bird down with olive oil, rubbed spices up under the skin, stuffed the cavity full of onions and celery and garlic. It turned out pretty good and yes, I did manage to eat a small piece of it. It was very juicy and flavorful, which is what you hope for.

At any rate, I think I’m going to head to bed. Just a few more days of dreaded third shift to go.Then, maybe back to living like a normal person?

Who knows.

Third shift made me do it

Posted: April 26, 2013 in Uncategorized
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Not write, that is.

I know… poor excuse, but it’s fact. There have been days this week when I parked the car and had to take a nap before I could find the energy to walk to the door.

I’m either old, or the shift is totally kicking my ass.

I’m voting the latter.

It’s not so much the shift as it is the shift combined with my lack of desire to eat anything. I got the riot act read to me by the dietitian today because I’ve not been getting enough protein. I don’t know what to say other than the thought of a protein shake nauseates me. She did give me some tips on how to make them more palatable, so I’m hoping things will improve on that front. I also found out that in two more weeks I can start to have more solid fruits and raw vegetables. I’m looking forward to those days. I miss crunching on celery and other raw veg. There’s something about the crunch factor, ya know?

So, the toe isn’t really healing as fast as I would like. This is very frustrating to me, mainly because I’m ready to start swimming laps again. I even found that my swimsuit fits, which is a huge deal. And no, it’s not a thong or Speedo. Nor a mankini (think Borat). I just promised myself I would not buy a larger one, no matter how much I wanted to swim. I made it, which is a good thing.

So, once again, I head to the office for a Friday night. I’m hoping that I’m starting to get used to the hours… I slept for six straight today, which is pretty good. Had a bizarre dream that involved a prepaid cellphone vending machine at Sheetz. Is there such a thing? I have no idea… I think I need to lay off the sauce.

I have one more week of third, then back to second, which is a lot easier for me to write. I find I have better stuff in the morning.

Hope you all have a great weekend!

Today’s weight: 317.0

Song of the Day: Dreams – The Cranberries

Sixty

Posted: April 22, 2013 in 5K, Bariatric surgery, Exercise, Foot issues, Goals, Physical activity, Supportive Partner Woman, Team AllEars, Weight loss
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Well, 59.8 pounds, but I think I can round it to sixty.

That’s a pretty big chunk of weight. It also represents about 37.5% of what my weight loss goal is. When I first met with Dr. McPhee, we thought 160 pounds was doable. I’m hoping it still is, especially when I can get back to the gym on a more regular basis. It was a good session with the boys this morning, foot or no foot. I did the X-Ride, 30 minutes of 30:30’s. They are insidious, but they really get the heart pumping. You don’t burn near as many calories, but the cardio is worth it. Also spent 30 minutes lifting weights. I’m noticing the loss of muscle mass since my operation, and the forced inactivity during my recuperation.

Speaking of the toe, I made a small modification to the Boot of Shame that I hope will hasten the healing. My logic is that since the hammer toe rubs on everything, add something that lifts the toe off the surface of the boot. I took heel pads, turned them upside down and put them under the ball of my foot. It seems to give just enough clearance to keep the toe out of harm’s way. I’m nothing if not creative, ya know?

So, I’m ready to head back to work tonight. It’ll feel strange, not having been there for four weeks. I’m actually looking forward to it, though. It will be nice to have something to do. Granted, I’ll probably be ready to be off another four weeks after a couple of hours. It’s how the cookie crumbles, I suppose. It will be nice to see some of my coworkers again after all this time.

In other news, I’ve had plenty of time to think and I’m probably going to start the 5K training (when the foot is healed) with a Couch to 5K program. I realize running the entire race is probably out of the question, but I’d like to run/walk. Maybe I should say “lumber” instead of “run”? Important thing is that I still am looking forward to doing it, especially with my teammates. And Supportive Partner Woman, of course. It’s gonna be epic!

At any rate, that’s what I have for the day. Hope I have more exciting stuff after a night at the office.

Song of the Day: Comfortably Numb – Pink Floyd

A wide range

Posted: April 21, 2013 in Bariatric surgery, Boston, Cooking, Digestive issues, Exercise, Foot issues, Formula 1, home improvement, Neil Diamond
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Good afternoon!

Neil at Fenway

Neil at Fenway

It’s been a few days since I’ve written. A lot has gone down. First of all, they took care of those two jokers in Boston. That’s a good thing. Granted, it’s not much solace to the folks who lost their lives or were permanently maimed, but it means they won’t be hurting anyone else. Secondly, Neil Diamond showed at Fenway Park to lead the crowd in Sweet Caroline. Granted, he was singing along with himself, which has to be a little awkward, unless you’re Bieber or any other of those modern-day hacks who can’t perform live to save their souls. At least he wasn’t lip-syncing.

We had Marvin the glass man in yesterday to replace the first two of four windows. He did a really nice job. It’s so nice to be able to look at the window and see more than just moisture between the panes. There’s one tiny hole where the gasket doesn’t fit the frame perfectly, so I went downstairs to find some caulk. What I found instead was a big puddle under the water heater. The water heater is not fast, though, however, the feed pipe has a pinhole in it. So, I’m waiting for Rob the handyman to show up and fix it. I always say that it’s important to have a stable of people who can do this sort of stuff, so you can get it fixed promptly by people you trust.

Other than that, the food intake has been improving, even if the toe isn’t improving that much. I’m still pretty bummed about that, but what can I do? No matter what I do, the tip of the tow rubs against the sock, the floor, or the Boot of Shame. I think I might have to have the podiatrist release the tendon that’s causing the toe to curl. Better than losing another toe. Back onto food, I managed to eat more scallops yesterday. They go down well and, more importantly, stay down. This is good. I’ve not had anything come up for two days, and I’ve had scallops and pulled turkey BBQ. Pretty yummy stuff. I can’t consume a lot of it, but that’s a good thing.

Weight has continued to decrease. Am down to 321.0 this morning. That makes 59 pounds lost, which is a good thing. I can’t help but think how much I’d be losing if I could actually work out. I know… nothing I can do about it, but I really REALLY want to get back to it.

Speaking of going back, I go back to work tomorrow night. I’m looking forward to it and dreading it at the same time. I’ll be glad for the work and the paycheck, but it’s the busiest two weeks of the year, so it will be a little crazy. Plus, I have to hope that my food continues to stay down. That would be awfully embarrassing. I’ll keep you posted.

I did manage to get up this morning to watch the Bahrain Grand Prix. Red Bull’s Sebastian Vettel ran away with the race, but the two other podium spots belonged to Lotus, which made me happy, especially since Kimi Raikkonen finished second. He’s become my favorite driver, mainly because he spends more time drinking the giant magnum of champagne rather than spraying it. Gotta love it.

Have a great Sunday!

Song of the Day: Sweet Caroline – Neil Diamond (It really couldn’t be anything else)

Moving right along

Posted: April 17, 2013 in Boston, Doctors and Dentists and Nurses... oh my!, local markets
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So, I got the quasi bad news yesterday. I’m sentenced to the Boot of Shame for a little while longer. For whatever reason, the toe is just not healing fast enough. It’s showing progress, the inflammation seems to be receding (like my hairline) and things are generally improving. Just not fast enough to suit me or my podiatrist. Sigh. He wants to see me in two more weeks, which means two weeks I have to take it easy at the gym. I’m not ready to take it easy… I’m chomping at the bit to do some work. It’s been three weeks since my operation, bring it on!

Diamondbacks Yankees BaseballI’m feeling a little better today. I’m not quite as down on humanity as I was yesterday. I actually hate to say it, but I was impressed by the actions of the New York Yankees, a team which I pretty much loathe on general principles. They showed a lot of class in their public support of their Boston counterparts, even going so far as to play Sweet Caroline during the 3rd inning of the Diamondbacks-Yankees game. Way to go, NYC!

Bramhall's World - Boston NY - New York Daily News 4/16/2013I’ve been struggling of late to find good stuff to eat. I have plenty of ideas, I just don’t feel inspired to make any of it. I think I’m generally tired of my choices thus far… after all, you can only eat so much string cheese before you simply get tired of it. I’ve been meaning to make black bean soup, but again, just haven’t felt inspired enough to make it. Maybe today. Another case of General Malaise rearing his ugly head, I guess. This has certainly been challenging… more so than I expected. I’ll get through and get back on track. I always do.

In other news, I got my authorization to return to work yesterday. According to the docs, I can go back on Monday, the 22nd. They insurance people were going to give me until the 26th, but since that’s a Friday and I’m on third shift, would it make a heap of sense to go back for one day on third shift, then have two days off? I was like, “Screw it… let’s just go back.”

Supportive Partner Woman and I then went to Root’s Market. It was really crowded, which is usually the case on those temperate days. We scored some strawberries and I got a new belt. There’s an Amish/Mennonite leather goods stand that does real sturdy belts, custom fit, for a reasonable price. Not only that, these belts hold up. My last belt went through two buckles and the leather is still in pretty good shape. It’s just a little too big for me anymore. I also managed to do some closet shopping. I dug out a polo I haven’t worn comfortably in well over a year, which makes me pretty happy. It fit pretty much perfectly and it was a favorite of mine.

I even managed to spray the front lawn for crabgrass… I don’t know why I bother, it never seems to work, but I at least feel that I did it. Maybe this will be the year. I have to hit it again in two weeks. I know, big doings. At least I was outside and walking around while I did it. It was exercise of some stripe. I also think I need to patch and paint the walls in the laundry area, as well as put down new flooring. It’s looking kind of beat up these days. Yay! A project!

Anyways, I’m going to wrap this up. I’ll leave you with a really inspiring story that I came across published in Mother Jones. Well worth the read.

Songs of the Day: Sweet Caroline – Neil Diamond (of course) and Fields of Athenry – Dropkick Murphys

What the _____ is wrong with people?

Posted: April 16, 2013 in Mickey Miles podcast, rants, Stress, Team AllEars
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544790_10200671889614808_1645566182_nLike many folks, I found myself flabbergasted by the events around the Boston Marathon yesterday.

My first reaction was one of disbelief… I figured it was a gas explosion or something like that… a horrible, tragic accident.

I was wrong and I wish I wasn’t.

My second thought was that I hoped my teammates from Team All Ears, three of whom were in the race, were all unharmed.

My third thought was quite honestly, “What kind of sick fuck does this?” I know that’s kind of blunt, but it’s obviously not the work of someone with even a tiny piece of humanity.

See, it bothered me more than I think it would have if I wouldn’t have gotten involved with TAE. While I’m not a real runner and probably never will be (let’s face it… the closest I’ll ever get to doing a marathon is driving 26.2 miles in a car), I have felt so welcomed by the team and the community that it feels like some of my family have been attacked. Just reading the posts has been eye-opening… the sheer amount of love and support poring from folks connected by one thread has really warmed my heart and put things in perspective.

I also want to give a shout out to the Mickey Miles podcast who organized a live call in show last evening with the able assistance of Mike Newell and MouseWorldRadio. Co-hosts Mike and Michelle did the right thing by giving folks a forum to discuss yesterday’s horrific events amongst similar-minded people.

I ask that you support Boston in the coming days. If you’ve done some running, wear a race shirt today (I only wish I had one to wear). Most importantly, KEEP RUNNING! We are strong and the actions of a coward or cowards (Yes, I said cowards) should not stop us from living. I refuse to live in fear, because a life lived in fear is a wasted life. You can get killed crossing the street… does that mean you should never cross the street? Does the thought of a crash cross my mind every time I step on board an airliner or board a train or even drive my car? It does, but my alternative is to never go anywhere or see or do anything. That’s not living.

So, stand up and be proud to be who you are. It’s when we change our way of life that the bad guys win. I don’t know about you, but I’m not ready to give up while there’s still time on the clock.

So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is…fear itself — nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance. – Franklin Delano Roosevelt

There is an international disease which feeds on the notion that if you have a cause to defend, you can use any means to further your cause, since the end justifies the means. As an international community, we must oppose this notion, whether it be in Canada, in the United States, or anywhere else. No cause justifies violence as long as the system provides for change by peaceful means. – Richard M. Nixon, 1970

Down…

Posted: April 15, 2013 in Uncategorized
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Some days you’re up, some days you’re down.

Today is one of those down days. I’m feeling so discouraged by the whole process. I miss a regular life. I’m bored, but what I really want to do (work out) I can’t do because of my stupid foot.

Sigh.

I knew going in that I would have days like these. I went to the fitness center, did my non weight bearing cardio and lifted weights. I was thirsty, so I took a drink of water from the cooler. That’s when the newest wrinkle appeared. Apparently, being heated up from exercise and cold water no longer mix. They equal barfs. I know it’s the temperature, but my first thought was, “Water? Seriously? WTF am I supposed to do now?”

I guess I’ll just keep plugging away. It’s what I do.

I’m doubting the process. Yes, it’s great that I crossed the 50 pound barrier, but I miss a normal life. I realize that’s my whiny inner child speaking… if I had lived a normal life before, I wouldn’t have been fat enough to have to undergo the operation. I made tuna salad last night for dinner. All I could have was just tuna salad. No crackers or anything. It’s kind of nasty, just salad, but it’s how the cookie crumbles. I’m actually afraid to try new stuff because I’m afraid I’ll just spit it right back up.

I guess impatience is a curse of mine. I want my foot to be healed so I can work out. I want the weight to come off, and I want to get back to eating a more balanced diet.

In the meantime, I just need to suck it up.

Sometimes, that’s all you can do.

New project

Posted: April 13, 2013 in Bariatric surgery, Cooking, diabetes, Foot issues, home improvement, previous occupant, Weight loss
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Since I need something to keep me busy, I thought I’d share the saga of the living room windows.

I might have previously mentioned that our development is the reason they instituted building codes in our township. To say that the contractors took some liberties would be putting it mildly. They used a lot of cheap materials (mainly the roof) and apparently the windows. Don’t get me wrong… the specs are fine. They are double-paned, low-e glass. That’s about where the good points stop. See, they have an alarming tendency to break the seals between the panes causing condensation. This has been the case with our living room windows since we moved in.

It’s not always been super high on our priority list. The truth is, we have sheer curtains that block the view of the window panes and, well, out of sight, out of mind.

This changed in the previous weeks… out of nowhere, one of the panes cracked. The inside pane. Just a big crack, nasty as you please. This has required us to engage the services of Marvin the Glass Man. Marvin came out, took measurements and will be installing new glass next week. I mentioned to SPW that it would certainly be nice to be able to open the windows. She concurred, then we realized that the skeevy previous occupant’s giant dogs did a number on the screens for those windows. I decided to give rescreening a try.

Now, know that I have never done this. I did not have tools or even know what was involved. I talked to me neighbor, who said it wasn’t too difficult. So, I went to Lowe’s, bought the materials and came home to give it a try.

The first attempt was not good. In an attempt to stretch the screen to make it nice and taut, I managed to rip it. Just tore like nobody’s business. I was not particularly happy about this… after all, that was good money I just wasted. So, I said, “I’ll try it again later.”

The second time was the charm.

So, I have one screen mostly done, and three more to go. As for Marvin, he’s coming next week.

In other news, I weighed in at 330.8 yesterday. That means I’m down 49.2 pounds since I started the program. I’m pretty pleased about that. I also ate my first real food. I had a scallop that tasted awesome. Paired with a scrambled egg, because, well, at this point, the variation in my menu is really limited. It was nice to actually chew something with substance, and it went down well. It stayed down, too, which is always a huge help. I’m actually really glad that fish and seafood are considered to be soft foods… some of my favorite foods are in that category.

So, I’m up early today because I need to go to a funeral. My dad’s cousin passed away a few days ago and I need to go to pay respects to the family. We kind of lost touch over the years, as often happens, but it’s what needs to be done. I also have to stop and pick up my mother, because the funeral home is located in Reading, and she’s scared to drive in the city. I tried to tell her that most of the drug dealers and gangbangers are not awake at 10 AM on a Saturday morning, but she wasn’t having any of that. I’m not disputing that Reading is pretty much a shithole , but I’m pretty sure I’m not going to get jacked just going to a funeral. The plus side is that I actually have clothes to wear that fit. I’m not going for a suit, mainly because my dress shoes no longer fit me (foot pronation has made them impossible to wear), but I’m sure my suit would actually fit again. Instead, khakis, dress shirt, necktie and a tweed jacket. Not exactly cutting edge, but presentable enough. It was funny, though… the last time I wore a dress shirt was for our niece’s college graduation and I was stuffed into it like a sausage. This time, it feels like a tent. I guess that’s better.

At any rate, hope you all have a great day!

Song of the Day: King of Anything – Sara Bareilles

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