Memoirs of a Soon-to-Be Former Fat Guy

So here I sit.

I’m in the chair in my very nice hospital room. I overlook the emergency room helipad, I found this out when I was sent on my first forced march yesterday. See, walking is a key. It helps to keep the blood flowing and avoid any clots.

The operation was no picnic, at least from my end. I remember being in recovery in a blanket of mental fuzziness. I don’t even recall being taken to my room. I remember a raging thirst, which I can only slake with a water-soaked swab, and also pressing the pain med dispensing button. I vaguely remember Supportive Partner Woman (Best wife Ever!) watching me drift in and out of wakefulness. I remember drifting in and out.

I remember the pain.

Yes, there is pain. I felt like I did about 1,000 crunches in very short order. It still hurts like a bastard.

The incisions themselves look pretty good. They are small and they glue them closed with some kind of surgical super glue. I couldn’t see all of them, but the one I could see was about 1/2 inch. There’s a bigger one that has a drain in it. That’s to help get rid of the sterile fluids and excess blood leftover. They will remove that before I go home on Thursday.

Today, they will be removing the dreaded catheter. I can’t wait. I’m not looking forward to getting that thing yanked out of my junk, but I’ll be glad to get rid of it. I also get to have some fluids today. Woohoo! It’s going to be a big change, having to eat and drink as slow as I’m going to have to. But I’ll adjust. I also think they are taking off the heart monitor this morning, too. That means I get the joy of taking off the leads. So, word of the day will be ouch.

I get to see Dr. McPhee today as well. He’ll want to check the incisions and go from there. I even get a shower!

The nursing care has been awesome. Heather, my day nurse, and Summer, the night nurse, have been super nice and super professional. Summer is actually in the program and goes for her procedure next week.

I’m sure I’ll post more later today, so I’ll stop right now.

Thanks again for all the awesome support. I’ll include a picture of my bed.