Archive for the ‘liquid diet’ Category

So, today had the promise of a pretty good day. I got some sleep, write a post, did stuff for awhile, the Supportive Partner Woman (Understanding!) and I went to visit her family. I’ve alluded to the fact that SPW’s mother has had some health issues and she is currently in a care facility for therapy and rehabilitation. As such, we’ve been known to take the holiday meal to her. SPW’s sister and brother-in-law brought a ham, potato filling, green bean surprise, corm, rolls, basically an entire feast.

I brought a container of sugar-free Jell-o and a container of sugar-free pudding.

easterI thought I’d be OK with it. I really thought I’d be OK with it. Then I made the mistake of thinking about it. Then, as a lark, I took pictures of the great disparity. Then I wanted nothing more than to eat real food. It was a physical longing such that I never really felt before. I just wanted some ham and potatoes and bread. Lots of bread. I just wanted to eat and eat and eat and eat. And the worst part is that I wasn’t even hungry. It was a compulsion

I was a junkie in search of his fix.

It scared me so much I couldn’t even talk about it with SPW, who was feeling incredibly guilty for eating real food in front of me.

I started wondering whether I had just made one huge mistake.

I’ve been pondering that since I got home. I was even trying to plot a way to put some leftovers in the blender and puree myself some Easter dinner.

Pureed ham. Ain’t nothing better ‘n that.

Seriously, though… I have to wonder if I’m always going to feel that way at a holiday table. Or if we go out. Will I always be craving that next meal? Was this just a moment of weakness or am I doomed to this feeling every time? I just don’t know.

In a way, those of us who are overweight have it tougher than folks addicted to alcohol or drugs or smoking. We still need food to survive. This whole episode today has me wondering if I can do this. If I really can succeed.

I guess I need to take it one day at a time.

Thanks for listening.

Yeah. This isn’t what I planned on, but it’s a major component of what I’m going through, so it’s going to get talked about. Let’s give it a high-level summation of “digestive issues”. If you’re not comfortable reading about those, click here and come back when the next post is up.

Are you sure you want to read this?

COMPLETELY sure?

There’s no going back now….

 

 

 

 

OK.

Digestive issues.

It’s what you might expect. vomiting and bowel movements. Both are apparently a little different for the post surgical bariatric patient. We’ll talk bowel movements first, since that’s what’s pressing, so to speak.

I was warned I wouldn’t have one for a few days after surgery. I’m still waiting. This, as you can imagine, is a bit uncomfortable. I’ve been drinking up water like a dry Sham-wow and nothing. I can’t try to force the issue to due the internal suturing and I’m always hesitant to take laxatives. I can sit on the toilet and all I get is gas. It’s such a letdown. I figure if nothing happens by Monday I’ll be calling the doc and seeing what he has to say. My personal opinion is that it has to do with the painkillers. Heavy duty painkillers always stop me up like one party blocking another party’s legislation from making it through Congress.

The other digestive issue that I’ve not experienced yet is vomiting. Apparently, vomiting no longer is the same as it was pre surgery. Since my pouch is separate from the part of the stomach that produces the stomach acids, gone is the unpleasant burning sensation and damage to the esophagus and teeth that can occur. This is not to say that I want to vomit… it’s never a fun feeling. I’m sure I will experience it as I expand my palate moving forward. There have also been times when I thought for sure it was going to happen, but nothing thus far.

Anyway, since all unpleasantness is out of the way, today should be a fun day. I’m expecting some visitors, including my mom and my sister. Mom made the right call in not opting to be there for my surgery. I’m sure her incessant pacing would’ve driven the waiting room nuts. Speaking of waiting rooms, Supportive Partner Woman (Possessor of great ideas!) had a way for the hospital to make some green.

Have the waiting rooms be sponsored by Xanax.

Just enough to take the edge off for those who have to wait. Either that or install a liquor vending machine.

She’s got a million of them.

Anyway, I’m going to leave with the following: MOASTBFFG crossed the 10,000 page view threshold this morning. That is totally amazing and that means that you, the readers, are totally amazing.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Song of the Day: The Touch – Stan Bush

Greetings from the Nerd Lair!

I arrived home earlier this afternoon via chariot pulled by unicorns. Or a Honda Civic. Close enough. Either way, it felt awesome to walk out of the hospital, get in the car and then be in our own house. I get to go back to full liquid diet, which meant I could have a protein shake for lunch. Woohoo!

Best part of my discharge instructions

Best part of my discharge instructions

The biggest news, which left me stepping lighter, is that I have been released from the insulin scourge. As you know, that was my primary reason for having the operation done. Pretty drastic, but the end result was what I wanted, no, needed to have happen. I needed to be off the insulin.

Everything seems to be healing up nicely. I’m limited to light activity for a couple weeks until I go back to see Dr. McPhee. Have to give the belly time to heal. I would post a picture of it, but it’s a little off-putting and I’d rather not gross anyone out.

My diet has returned to full liquids. I can go to pureed foods in a couple of weeks. Basically, I have to learn to eat again. To figure out what I can and can’t handle. So far, I’m able to handle a protein shake, so that’s a good thing. I’m going to try some soup for dinner… again, nothing major in terms of quantity… I just need to remember that it’s most important to stay hydrated

My other big news is that I committed to join Team AllEars. I’ve been toying with the idea for quite some time, but I could never seem to get myself in good enough shape. I’m planning on running/walking in the 2014 Walt Disney World Marathon Weekend 5K. I know it’s not a long distance, but for someone who’s never run in his life, it’s huge. I’m excited because I’ll be teaming up with some of the finest people I know and in support of Avon breast cancer charities. Both Supportive Partner Woman (considering going Paleo!) and I know people who have survived and who have succumbed to breast cancer, and its hard to think of a more worthy charity. As I told my co-captain, “It won’t be fast and it won’t be pretty, but I’m going to finish it.”

I’ll post more about that later.

So, I’ve said it before, but this is when my life is really going to start. It’s not going to be easy… believe me that bariatric surgery is never the easy way out, but I’m determined to get my body in shape and to keep it that way. I’ve wasted a lot of years (and part of toe) in service to food and poor habits. Now that I see how good it feels to be active, I’m going to grab that lifestyle and go as far as I can with it. It’s not going to be easy, but how many really good things are?

I’ll keep you posted, and, for the record, the happiest moment on this blog is going to be when I can post a picture of myself crossing that finish line.

Yeah… now it sets in.

I got the call this morning that my arrivale time at the hospital will be 8:50 AM. That means the procedure will probably go down around 11:00. Basically, I have less than 24 hours until my life changes forever.

That’s not entirely true… my life has changed already. I’ve made the adjustments to my eating and lifestyle. I’ve had my psychological session. I sat through classes on diet, learned the correct way to exercise and learned a lot more about the way the body functions (or malfunctions in my case). I also learned just how many people are rooting for me.

That last was the biggest lesson.

I never saw many people as being good friends. Sure, I had acquaintances, but I always saw my fat as an obstacle to true friends. I just assumed that people were talking about me behind my (broad) back. It wasn’t until I got involved in the Disney community that I started feeling accepted. I say “started” because I still harbored some serious doubts about my own self-worth. I think I will always struggle with that, but I can deal a lot better than I used to.

Dealing with life as a more normal sized person will be a big change. I’m going to have to put myself out there again. I’ll need to learn to not assume I’m too fat to do something and try it again. It will be nice to no longer have to request a table in a restaurant because I’m too fat for a booth. Even fitting in the break room seats at work won’t be a challenge. It will be even nicer to not forego a ride that I previously passed on due to fat.

Even buying clothes won’t be as much of a hassle. No longer needing to shop at Thornton Melon’s Tall and Fat will be a nice change of pace.

The biggest positive change I see is the elimination of the insulin. I think insulin makes you fatter… I don’t necessarily have any scientific proof to this, but it seems that I can do more exercise that I did three years ago and lose a lot less weight. In 2010, I could lose five pounds a week, now I struggle to do that in a month. Main difference? Insulin.

I know I’ve thanked everyone for their support, but there are some that really deserve some credit that I never thanked before. They would be the coworker who would talk shit about my weight and think I didn’t hear him. The comments about me not going to the beach because people would try to put me back in the water, well, they hurt at first. Then they really pissed me off the more I thought about it. It inspired me to take steps to improve my health. So, I’d like to give out a big thank you to him. The real irony is that the individual in question isn’t exactly what you would call svelte.

Anyway. That’s some people for you. Luckily, not everyone is like that.

I might write another post tonight, or at least tomorrow morning. I’ll keep you posted throughout the process.

I wonder if SPW ever thought of doing this for me?

I wonder if SPW ever thought of doing this for me?

Haven’t written for a few days. To be honest, I haven’t wanted to do much more than sleep. Consequence of the liquid diet, I’m sure. No energy. That’s beside the point. 48 hours from now, I’ll be hopefully all recovering and mainlining the morphine like nobody’s business. I’ve had to promise that I won’t let Supportive Partner Woman (Page designer of uncanny skill!) confiscate my phone. Apparently, some folks feel that any status updates or texts that I make while high will be amusing.

I’m not sure how to take that.

Anyway, I had to work last night and wanted to stop and pick up some unflavored protein powder on my way into the office. I trudged through SaveMart and located what I was looking for… some strawberry flavored powder as well as the unflavored powder. As I walked out of the door, my nose was assaulted with the smell of freshly baking pizza from the pizza shop across the way.

That’s just not fair.

At all.

Anyway, as I was getting ready for work, I thought, “What the hell?” and actually attempted to button my jeans at the waist, rather than the hips. To my surprise, it could actually be done. Go figure. It wasn’t comfortable in the least, but it’s a little victory. I’m all in favor of those.

In other news, the unflavored powder mixes pretty well with tomato soup. I’m looking forward to trying it with regular chicken broth… it will be less sodium for sure.

So, one more work day tomorrow, then I’m off for four weeks. I’ll be sure to keep you all posted, and even some scale pictures when it finally stops saying, “One at a time, please.”

Thanks again for all the support.

but maybe I’m deluded.

See, the liquid diet goes on. There are plusses… such as I lost another 3.5 pounds since Friday. I’m also sure it was more, as on Friday I was wearing workout clothes. In addition, since I started the liquid diet, I haven’t had to take any of my heavy duty insulin. I’ve been doing one injection a day of Levemir and it’s controlling things pretty well. So, yay on that front.

I had an appointment this morning with Rachel (awesomest primary care provider in the county!) and she was pretty pleased. It was odd, though… I didn’t step on the scale with that sense of dread that I normally have.

In other news, the blood pressure was 128/82. Still a smidge high, but part of that could be white coat syndrome. My resting pulse was 68, which is far better than what it used to be. I can only imagine how it will be when I’m thinner and working out again. Plus, once I’m a little smaller, I can start swimming again.

Look out world, Brian is getting healthy!

The real downside is that I’m cold all the time. Like the body doesn’t have quite fuel to keep it as warm as it used to be. I might need to invest in some long sleeve shirts at some point.

So, I’ve been having Unjury Chicken Soup protein powder for my lunch/dinner. It’s really not too bad, taste-wise. I’m not a huge fan of the sodium content, but the protein is more important, IMHO. I’ve also seen that some people recommend mixing plain protein powder with tomato soup while on the liquid diet. It also just dawns on me that I could mix the plain powder with salt-free chicken broth and get the whole enchilada… taste, low salt, AND protein. Woot!

In the good news department, I was able to toghten another notch in my belt and close my coat for the first time in, well, forever. I love my coat. See, Supportive Partner Woman (awesomest sports editor ever!) and I went to Cabela’s about 7 years ago and found a whole rack of mice winter coats on clearance. I bought this navy blue coat, with a hood for around $35 and it’s kept me warm ever since. I just haven’t been able to close it, because I was too fat. Lo and behold, when I went to zip it up yesterday, it was missing the zipper pull, which does not make me happy, but I’ll need a new coat by next winter anyway. A smaller one. Maybe Cabela’s will have another clearance sale… that would be cool. I’ve lucked out at their store from time to time. I once got a pair of $58 gloves for $7.50. Thinsulate and Goretex and big enough to fit my hands.

At any rate, that’s all I have at this juncture. Hope that you all have a great day. I’m getting a haircut after work… that’s much needed, believe you me.